Tag Archives: encouragement

Put me in coach

3 Oct

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I don’t like sitting on the side lines. I’m an “ALL IN” or “nothing” kind of girl.

I want to be on the team and I want to participate in EVERY game.

….or I want to go home and put on my pajamas.

IN or OUT

Piece by piece, I devour the play book..over and over… I study until I find gaps. Then I work to fill them…My appetite for dissecting strategy never wanes. Every nugget feeding my passion to learn.

I want on the team but my ego isn’t comfortable being center stage. In fact, I’m a bit skittish to be the pitcher. All eyes focused on his windup. A collective gasp from the stands, releasing only when the ball meets the catcher’s glove.  His choice of pitches are constantly questioned by those not wearing a uniform.  Their voice loud as it drifts through the stands and onto the diamond.

In baseball, there is no possible way to win the game with an inadequate pitcher. If they are having an ‘off‘ night, they get pulled. Often in the middle of the inning, forcing a walk of shame back to the dug out. Not before, however, a seemingly supportive one-on-one with the coach.  Backs turned to on lookers, I often wonder what they are saying….How do you publicly tell one of your premiere players it is time to sit down now….. As a player, how do you handle that with grace?

It is a tough position to play.

I would not sign up for the whole world to witness that. In fact, I’ve spent most of my life avoiding the walk of shame… like the plague….

The catcher is required to wear so much protective equipment, he barely can move.  Leg guards, knee savers, a heavily padded leather glove the size of a dinner plate, vision limited by a cage protecting his face. Which is no doubt further limited by the sweat dripping from his brow. They are outfitted for a fight…. Some would say that I rarely back down…they could be right. However, I never go looking for it.  No, this position doesn’t sound appealing to me.

I’m happiest on first base. It calls my name.

First base has a foot hold in the action but also has a bit of distance from the voices in the stands. He doesn’t rest idly waiting for a play. He is in the game, with every swing of the bat.  Multitasking is a must, monitoring all of the bases for movement with each and every hit.  Thinking instantaneously,  maneuvering nimbly and with out hesitation, he eagerly awaits the ball in play.

As my cleats hit the clay, I realize I’m also desperate to not miss my opportunity at bat.

In the batting cages, I’m perfecting my swing, my stance.  Striking out is not an option. I’m simply not patient enough to wait for the bating order to come around to me again….That is a whole lot of sitting and a whole lot of waiting.

I wasn’t made to be a bench warmer.

With diligence and the right amount of preparation, I’ll be ready when the pitch rolls down the plate.  Hearing my bat kiss the face of the ball, splitting the air like the sharpest of knives, I’ll shoot my  hands in the air for the victory lap.

When the inning turns over, I’ll resume my spot on first base.  Scanning the field every few seconds to analyze the players of game, mindful of the ever changing strategy.

When it is quiet, and honesty rises to the surface, I want in the game.

ALL IN.

Put me in coach, I’m ready to play.

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Dream Weaver

15 Sep

Intricately spun with precision. Moving diligently with perfection and grace as it crosses, then descends.  It is an unequaled masterpiece.  I stop to gaze; amazed by the ability of such a small creature to weave so beautifully.  Elegantly trapping her dinner…the Martha Stewart of nature.  Perched high on my toes, I tilt my head to the left, and then the right, analyzing the design nestled between two trees. All while keeping watch on the moving spider inside.

Twice this week, while walking through trails, I’ve passed two colossal banana spiders. Often painted with brightly colored bodies, stripped leggings, and spanning the width of my palm, they are quite the sight.  Scary because of their size, they command attention. I willingly give it to them, watching with childlike curiosity.

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Both weavers ironically were in the same predicament. Working feverishly, you could see the anticipation as the web bounced with movement.  Wrapping, spinning, scurrying up and down the silk lines they drew the day before. No doubt, salivating over the meal they were so hungry to devour.

As I watched from a distance, a twinge of sorrow swept over me.  For all their effort, they deserved a meal made for a queen. But it wasn’t there. It wasn’t in their web.

No.  A fallen brown leaf, had become tangled. Twisting in the wind, it gave the impression of life.  She worked as if it were true.

Both times I thought, “I wonder if they know they are working on a leaf” Surely not.

Shrugging, realizing I was unable to assist…If I tried, the potential of damaging the web was high. Pulling her farther from her only goal, satisfying hunger. She would have to rebuild, spending even more energy…No, that wasn’t fair. I could only watch with the hope she realized her mistake quickly.

With nothing more for me to do, I continued my walk wondering how many times in our lives,   —-  read here  < In my life > —  , are we working so hard to accomplish the things we think we need? What we think we want?  Putting in long hours, wearing ourselves out, spending time fruitlessly, going into spiritual debt….working….spinning….

Only for someone, with the clarity of distance to say, “I wonder if she knows that is just a ….leaf?” Having the same realization that we must do this alone. Forced to watch as we flounder, expending unnecessary energy in an area that will not serve us. Prayerfully they are hoping we “get” it sooner than later.

Simultaneously I was aware that I’ve felt this way many times watching my children…If only I could make their path straighter, clear of debris…easy…Yet I know…I know… it doesn’t work that way. They are better equipped for their next bump when they muscle through today’s struggle.

I wonder how many times God looks down at our choices and responds the same way?

“It is only a leaf dear girl…move along. I have greater things planned for you.” 

Letter to Ashley

12 Jul

Dear sweet beautiful Ashley,

I saw it in your big brown eyes. Heard it in the tremble of your voice.  The residual pain lingered on the surface  from when someone unknowingly spewed judgement over your life.  Those words that insinuated that your choices didn’t line up with their view.  At that moment the world stopped for me. The air evaporated from the room. My stomach twisted and was tense…I didn’t respond the way I wanted to.  I have a hard time processing hate on the fly.

It has been on my heart and on my mind ever since.

I don’t want ANY young lady, who chooses to give life, to feel like she doesn’t live up to some invisible standard. Especially one whom I adore and love.

I believe with all my heart that God blesses those who make hard choices that line up with his word.  I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it.

When I look back at all those people who insisted they were doing it “right”, I shake my head.  I wouldn’t want their shoes for anything in the world.

I’ve watched you with the princess.  You are going to be amazing at this mom thing!  Don’t let anyone tarnish your sparkle.  Shut out that judgmental nonsense.  “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do”  – Job 23:10.

You have so much love to give.  I promise you,  God doesn’t make mistakes!

With all my heart I shout to the world that we are so proud of you! I pray abundant blessings over your life.  I can’t wait to watch you grow and watch God work in your life.

Good things are coming! Hold on tight! This is going to be a beautiful bumpy road.

He Knows Where I'm Going - Job 23:10 - Bible Verse - Blank Notecard - Encouragement - Graduation - Blank Inside - Gold. $4.00, via Etsy.

Rolla’ Coasta of love

9 Jul

This rolla’ coasta  I’m on feels pretty damn good right about now.  When I’m at the tip top, I can see for miles. Smiling as wide as my mouth will allow, eyes ablaze. I feel alive, invincible, capable of virtually anything .  I seriously can’t get much higher. My soul wants to leap out of my chest. Surely I have happiness dripping out of my pores.  Someone really should find a way to bottle this stuff and sell it. It would be worth a fortune. Roller Coaster, Magelibanen, Norway. What a beautiful view from the roller coaster! I'm in! :) Because before you know it, here comes a dip…or a drop…a big dip / drop… valley.

Since I boarded this thrill ride  last week, I’ve had lots of  “opportunities”  to be offended.   Each threatening to end my rolla’ coaster of happiness way to soon.

Just this weekend after a seriously BIG opportunity,  I said to my husband in my high pitched, yet stern tone, “HONEYYYY! My redneck side is about to come out!”

His response?  “Tuck it back in, babe.”

I rolled laughing. Literally.  Rolled laughing.

It was the BEST thing he has EVER said to me.

That laughter was enough to allow my car to coast out of the dip and soar to yet another high, unbelievably higher than the last…  Once again I was at the peak, swinging my dangling legs , relishing my new found height.   I summoned up the courage to open one eye and look around. I really didn’t want to though…Fear was riding shotgun.

(One eye always helps when fear has taken hold of your heart.  Two eyes are just to much to handle in times like these.)

This place, this peak, felt so good. Like crazy, head over heels, exquisitely deliciously good.  I was afraid to lose it.  Afraid to let even an ounce slip through my fingers. I was desperately holding on for dear life with all that I had. More than anything, I wanted to be here…forever.  To make this peak my new home.

Now with both eyes open, sadly, I  knew it just wasn’t  possible.

Why? Because life is about the peaks AND the valleys. If it were not for the valleys, we would never know how awesome it feels when to hit the peak! Roller coaster face- this made me laugh. Poor baby Really…

Really, it is about OUR (read here -> MY) attitude in the valley.

Choosing to keep your redneck tucked in until you can coast to the next peak.  Using your opportunities to grow to new heights instead of allowing them to bring you down deeper into the valley.

Don’t let a thief steal your joy. We all know they are not worth it.

Half the time THEY know they aren’t worth it.

Poor pitiful souls. Relationship Quotes--Become a Love Magnet with "52 Romantic Things To Do" LOVE  LIGHT 2 YOUR SOULS

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